Dear Me,

It has been a such a long time since i've been honest with you. So long that i don't think you listen anymore...i wonder if anyone listens anymore though, but that's just because i've been trying to forget...that's another conversation. i just wanted to let you know that i have blood on my hands. blood from the sociopathic murder spree that i've been on the past 3 months. stabbing and strangling the relationships that have meant the most to me.....until irreparable damage has been done-relationship murder in the 1st degree. family, love, friends, career--fuck it, none of it has mattered. just my need to abandon muthafuckas the same way that everyone else has exited my life when it was convenient. i'm tired of being there for everybody....i'm tired of absorbing the poison from everybody else's life. i'm dying inside from the vat of the toxins that resides comfortably in my heart. The vat that has ALL of the shit that the world decided to give to me as a gift. The gift that has been enriching my human journey, helping to calibrate my world perspective. i'm sorry but the world and everybody in it can kiss my ass right about now. and yes Me too, you've been nothing more than a source of stress, attempting to be a voice of reason and balance, forcing me to be everything to everybody. i'm so tired of your childish efforts to impact and love, fight and cry for people who are really not interested in your insignificant thrusts at altering the planet. yeah, i've had enough of that. So, i think it's time for you to find a new address, because you're not welcome here anymore. it's time for me to be a little more selfish and you're impeding the progress. You have official been served. You have 48 hours to get all your shit up outta here; the Cocoa Butter and incense, Cheikh Anta Diop and Edwidge Danticat books, the Steel Pulse and Public Enemy cds, the Ashra Kwesi and John Henrik Clarke videotapes.....yeah, take all that bullshit somewhere else. I'm getting back to basics. Giving a fuck takes way too much energy i find, so this is the most effective course of action. Shouts out to all those who help me make this decision, you know who you are! It has been quite a struggle, but now i'm really free. i don't know what the hell i was talkin' bout before. slave this and that, shit i am going to take my proud place in the realm of Niggadom and call it a life. This is my bona fide goodbye to Me and everybody else who loved and appreciated his ass, that nigga is leaving.